Monthly Archives: March 2014

The U.S. Supreme Court heard oral argument this week on what has been coined the "Hobby Lobby" case. Hobby Lobby is a chain of retail arts and crafts stores that claims it should not be forced to cover the cost of certain contraceptives in its basic health plan.  The basis for its position is the constitutional right to freedom of religion:   Telephone  rings at Hobby Lobby : -This is Hobby Lobby, where craft ain't macaroni unless it's glued. May I help you? -Oh, yes! Shoddy Body? ... [click here to read more]
You might have heard about the New Jersey teen who climbed to the top of the One World Trade Center after sneaking in through a hole in the fence.  You might have heard about the individuals who got in to base jumped off of the building back in September. When you're building the tallest building in America, you can't be expected to seal off every gap in the fence.  That would be far to reasonable.  Yesterday, security at WTC finally came together. Two CNN producers were arrested for attempting ... [click here to read more]
U.S. News and World Report has released its 2015 Best Law School rankings and we at Comedians at Law fear that once again this publication has missed the boat. We could not agree less with the criteria used to rate these schools. What are the qualities that make a law school great?   1.  Nice curtains 2.  Cool school colors 3. Fierce mascot 4. Clothing optional, or... 5. Pajama Bottom Fridays 6. Pina Colada Mondays 7. At an awesome subway stop 8. All "A's" policy 9. ... [click here to read more]
  I’ve been following the Crimea situation to the point that I currently understand that it exists and Vladimir Putin wants to make it part of Russia.  However, it seems like Catherine the Great, Russian leader and Civ 5 juggernaut, signed an agreement that may cause the rights to Crimea to pass to Turkey. Once Crimea announced independence from Kyiv, Turkey had the right to take control of Crimea due to an agreement signed by Catherine the Great and the Ottoman Empire in 1783. Does ... [click here to read more]
An ABA Journal article, entitled "Lawyers in prestige positions aren’t as happy as those in public service-jobs, study finds"  reports on a recent survey that found that "lawyers in 'prestige' jobs, who had the highest grades and incomes, aren’t as happy as lawyers working in public-service jobs for substantially lower pay." So, there's the good news.  You're broke, and debt-ridden, but you're interning for a public-service agency while you try to find a job with benefits.  You must be ... [click here to read more]
The U.S Supreme Court does not look kindly upon humorous briefs according to the  New Jersey Law Journal.  This does not come as a surprise from the same esteemed body that dictates the size of the paper, the font of the print, the length of the brief and the format of the citations. Since anal retention is funny to everyone but the anal retentive, it behooves those who appear before the Court to keep it serious. It should be noted that the rules do not apply to  the members of the  U.S. Supreme ... [click here to read more]
  Some time ago, the assembly line style Mexican restaurant Chipotle hired super talented singer/rapper Frank Ocean to remake Pure Imagination from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory for one of the company's commercials.  Chipotle paid Mr. Ocean $212,500  in advance. Only, Mr. Ocean never delivered the song.  It seems he didn't like the idea of remaking the Gene Wilder song to promote sub-par guacamole, sour cream, and quesoritos.  Not to be out done, Mr. Ocean made great use ... [click here to read more]
The new US News & World Report law school rankings are out, and number 1 is  . . . really who  cares?  If you go there you know. If you go to a school in the top 10, you know what your school is ranked, and you know who's number 1.   And, if you didn't go to a top 10 school, you really don't care about who's in the top 10 because you know it's not your school, and you know, further, that your resume will forever be anchored down by the abysmal ranking of your school --  the University of ... [click here to read more]
             A lawsuit in New Jersey state court alleges that the chief executive of Modell's Sporting Goods, Mitch Modell,  misrepresented himself at Dick's Sporting Goods in order to gather information about its operations, according to the New Jersey Law Journal. We at Comedians at Law were fortunate enough to overhear the conversation culminating in the lawsuit:   Dick, Jr.: Welcome to Dick's! May I help you sir? From the way you're pulling at your crotch, you look ... [click here to read more]
  Keurig has become immensely popular in offices and homes around the country.  For those unfamiliar, the Keurig is a coffee maker which allows users to make single cups of coffee using disposable pods.  Supposedly, making coffee this way is extremely time and money saving for people that can’t stand human interaction or deal with spending a minute using a regular coffee machine. The company is allegedly in the process of developing a new version of their popular machine that will ... [click here to read more]

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